There have been some absolute gems over the years, what are your favourites ?

i liked there's only 2 andy Goram's when he was diagnosed with schitzophrenia

another good one was "you're not the real ronaldo" when the winker first turned up in england.

LOL. Always amuses me people think schizophrenia means you have multiple personality(s). Funny though


Mine is,

Your sister is your mother,
Your nuncle is your brother,
You all fuck one and other,
The scouser family.

For when we play the mancs (we don't sing about yous all the time)

Gary Neville Shags his mother,
And his father,and his brother,
All the Nevilles Shag each other,
Fucking Inbreds

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here's two not so well known LFC songs i always like to sing but they've about died out now and only get sung in the pub.

A-L-O---N-S-O it's Alonso
Xabi Xabi Alonso
A-L-O---N-S-O it's Alonso
Xabi Xabi Alonso

Xabi came to Liverpool from Sociedad,
His passing and his shooting is Sublime,
And if we had to choose between him and Fat Frank,
We would choose Xabi everytime,

A-L-O---N-S-O it's Alonso
Xabi Xabi Alonso
A-L-O---N-S-O it's Alonso
Xabi Xabi Alonso

Down at Luton Town in the FA cup,
Xabi and the keeper had a race,
Xabi took a shot from 70 yards,
You should of seen the look on Gerrards face,

A-L-O---N-S-O it's Alonso
Xabi Xabi Alonso
A-L-O---N-S-O it's Alonso
Xabi Xabi Alonso............................(looks like this will go the way of Gary Mac)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mourinho said don't worry Chelsea have nothing to fear
But how he went so quiet when up popped Luis Garcia
His shot it had no power but then he took his goal
And now he's taking Rafa to Istanbul

Rafael, Rafael, Rafa in Istanbul

Benitez said don't worry I'll wipe away your tears
Cos Stevie G's a Red and a Red he'll be for years
You can keep your John Terry, stick your Lampard up your arse
Cos Carragher is here and Gerrard's staying ours

Rafael, Rafael, Rafa in Istanbul.

To be honest though there's too many top songs (both LFC and rivals) to list,that said too many fans are starting to just plain rob other teams fans which is sad because it only takes a bit of imagination to come up with something original and whitty.

Build a bonfire, build a bonfire,
Put the scousers on the top.
Put the city in the middle
And burn the f*ckin lot...


He's half a boy and half a girl,
Torres! Torres!
He looks just like a transvestite,
Torres! Torres!
He wears a frock,
He loves the cock,
He sells his arse on Albert Dock
Fernando Torres, Carragher's bit on the side

He plays on the left,
He plays on the right.
That Boy Ronaldo,
Makes England look shite!

Park, Park, wherever you may be,
You eat dogs in your home country!
It could be worse, you could be a Scouse,
Eating rats in your council house!


Oh, Keano's fuckin' magic
He wears a magic hat,
And when he saw Old Trafford,
He said "I fancy that!"
He didn't sign for Arsenal,
Or Blackburn 'coz they're sh1te,
Oh he signed for Man United,
'Coz they're fuckin' dynamite...

My fav though is 12 days of Cantona

as Skamp says toomany tomention

You are my solskjaer
my ole solskjaer
you make me happy, when skies are grey
and alan shearer, was fucking dearer
but please don't take my solskjaer away


To the tune of batman:

du na na na na na na na du na na na na na na na JAAP STAM

Alan Shearer's illegitimate,
He aint got no birth certificate,
He's got aids and cant get rid of it,
Dirty black and white bastard!!!!!!!


Andy Reid plays left wing, he likes mcdonalds and burger king.
He gets the ball fakes a pass, hes got more skill then cesc fabergas

i'm a rangers fan but the chant 'you're just a fat eddie murphy' aimed at jean claude darcheville was pretty funny

i imagine most of your chants are unprintable

Cheer up Peter Reid,
Oh what can it mean,
To a sad Mackem bastard
And a shit football team.

^Made before the Prawn sarnie eaters converted it to Alan Shearer.

-----------------------------
When I was just a little boy
I asked my mother: "What will I be?
Will I be Pompey? Will I be Saints?"
Here's what she said to me:

"Wash your mouth my son,
go get your fathers gun,
shoot the Pompey scum
and support the Saints!
-------------------------------



Doesn't even rhyme.. girl and transvestite? Typical Manc chant lol. The Evertonians made a better one then that lol.



Kudos, Everton.

Best fans in the game - West Ham United. Absolutly fantastic support and chants lol!

That was just rippped of off our original Neville song.

His Sister is his mother
His father is his brother
They all shag one n other
The Neville family

You have got to be fucking kidding me,that post would cause all sorts of shit to go off in your psych report Tams.




We are the scousers
The cocks of the north
We hate man utd and city of course
We only drink whisky and bottles of brown
The Liverpool boys are in town
Na na na na nanananana nanananana

Oh we're the boys on the social,
The boys on the dole,
We're so fucking ugly
We can't get our hole,
But we all go mental
When we score a goal,
Oh the Liverpool Boys are in town.
Na, na, na.
Liverpool,Liverpool,Liverpool.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Easter monday at the shit pit
Blue scum crying what a sight
Walking wounded, gaping gashes
Left by Gary Mac the knife.

Twisted faces spitting venom
Season tickets torn to shreds
Smashed up bus stops, housewives beaten
As reds lay wanking in their beds.

Round to my house all the boys came
We wont go that, pit no more
Woke the kids up doin the conga
At twenty five past fucking four.

Two were hanging from the lampshade
Another clung to the curtain pole
I got my head stuck in the ceiling
When Gary scored that fucking goal.

Oh what a party , what a scoreline
I've never been so fucking pissed
Andrew Lloyd Webber,Walt fucking Disney
Couldnt have wrote a better script.

Crying bastards chipped up arseholes
Wondering why, all round the ground
You disrespected the minutes silence
So boy what goes round comes around.

You are the pimple on our arseholes
You're the shite between our toes
You're the skidmarks in our undies
And the bogies up our nose.

On the front of every programme
Kenwright productions proudly present
A puppet show for all the children
Every Saturday at 3 pm.

Now im so happy im doin strange things
Last night I even kissed the wife
Said excuse me when I farted
Because of Gary Mac,
The kniiiiiiiiiiiiiiife

Real songs with no racist shit in them Tams.

/care face. Copy/pasted from a chant forum, I found it hilarious. You don't like, cry more.

Ibrox and Parkhead aren't half as bad as they used to be for the bigotry

Is true,we're talking about West Ham here so do you think it is sang with racist intent ?

You'd get kicked out of any staduim in the country if you sang that shit,as it is the Hammers when they sing it sing it in the pubs but if they sang it at the ground the club would rightly get hammered..

I love how racists always blame political correctness when they get pulled up,the sol campbell incident was a case of pc gone mad but that chant fucking aint.

Its not a Spurs chant, its a West Ham (Arsenal fans are all you hear saying it these days) one directed at Spurs and the fact they supposedly have Jewish supporters. Just to make that clear to other readers.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yid_Army
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alf_Garnett

It is a factual statement though, Jews don't have foreskins, so therefore it would avoid the racist term imo. It's more a religious jibe if anything.




Say's the fans with the worst strip ever, heading the way of Leeds United and "Nothing since '69" pmsl

Sunderland Fans - Noisiest in the Land!!

http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/26102007/58/...oise-table.html

Neither have you since 73 lol

Can't help but laugh at that table btw... Liverpool 4th bottom? Jesus..

Yeah, but our fans don't prance around like they deserve it (trophies), Newcastle have for years. The likes of the Sky generation thinking the black and white minnows are some kind of timeless giant. The same media which has portrayed them as some sort of mega club of global standing, get down. They're like the Jack Russel you never wanted, humping the legs of the other Prem clubs.

Fair dos, however Newcastle were a big club through the 90's, huge even - A world Record fee to Land Big Al cannot be made by a low end club. To disrespect Alan Shearer in your first post is comical when he's basically the greatest striker England has ever had, and argubaly the greatest striker the EPL has ever seen

In finiancial terms for the last 15 years - Newcastle were up there with Liverpool & Arsenal and I believe had Ashley not fucked them over in recent history - They would be still in the EPL.

...back on topic please, most ot the chants are just remixes of old ones but the second Macheda scored the winner against Villa and the chant are you watching,are you watching, are you watching merseyside rang out in the stadium was one the best moments in my life (going to rome one the other hand was a shit moment)...

Hit 'em were it hurts that's the whole point, the same if the Mancs/everton etc diss Stevie G. Is it not allowed simply because of his National position? His (AS) golden boot record etc speaks for itself, no denying that.

Their rise in the Keegan era wouldn't have been so bad, had it not been so graceless. Sick of their shirtless twats, whining about the next Messiah. He aint coming, get over it and enjoy your away games at Scunthorpe. Not to mention that bit of red and white on their strip in the form of the Championship badges.

I'm pretty damn sure no fans are hurt with chants against Alan Shearer lol... he's a living legend and fans that do sing of such a player in the manor you spoke of - The joke is really on them :S

Keegan did very well start of season picking up a draw at OT - Had it not been for Ashley and Wise they would be still in the EPL. He's an extreamly good coach, his record speaks for itself.

As for the messiah crap - It's the media that blows that stuff out of porpotion, and not the average Newcastle fan. Having lived in Gosforth for the last 3 years, I understand their anger at the way the club has gone down hill. They are too big a club to be in the Championship. Ask 90% of the footballing fans in England if they wanted Newcastle to go down - The answer would be no. They are a credit to the English league - Fantastic support of 50k strong week in week out, plus their amazing away support also.

They 100% won't be another Leeds btw lol... they'll be back in the EPL next season, quote me on this.

...support your local team then,or is moving away from the area not allowed...

4 out of the last 10 posts have been from yourself.

noted.....they are where they belong,as they are shit.
got no money and wont be back next year.........think you are believing the locals hype about how big a club they are

cut it out people, jeez...

i dont wanna see all the bullshit talk in here ive removed

What on earth are you on about? What did my post have to do with what you have said... care to elaborate?

I live in Newcastle as I was at Uni here, nothing more, nothing less. Apparently your from London/LA... true fan I guess haha.


Have you seen some of the shit that was removed? Lol. Nightingales is power hungrey.. hell, even 007 didn't see nessisary to remove any of the quotes and he understands football.


Their fans> you

I wouldn't bring up "lack of capitalisation" or "grammatical errors" If I was you. Since your posts are full of spelling mistakes generally, bit of the old "pot calling the kettle" there.


If the unsourced Bill Hicks quote offends you, get thicker skin. It is directed at everyone in the military not just you. My cousin sitting next to me is a Lieutenant and he finds it funny as fuck.

His hamstrings gonna go again... Owen Owen
Where were you in istanbul? ...Owen Owen
You fucked off to sunny spain
And hardly ever got a game
Michael Owen will win fuck all again !
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

...its a truly sad sight to behold when a team turns against one of their greatest players (how long before its Alonsos turn ?),Owen never won shit with liverpoor to begin with let alone win it again!...

...VIVA RONALDO...

@Tams my deepest apologies for missunderstanding your post

i have complete respect for alonso and hope hes a success at madrid

owen is completely different he let his contract run down and assured us he would re sign and in the end we had fook all for him

yes he was a great player for us but he has no respect for the club he showed it when he signed for united, its the same as someone like rooney signing for us, it just shouldnt happen, he has no respect so why should we respect him?